Stranded

There are times where i feel like the world is closing in on me.
There are times where i feel a dark cloud upon me.
There are times where the sun just don't shine anymore.
There are times where the air i breathe becomes thinner.

Is it just me?
What made me feel this way?
Is it all just made-up?
Is it something that will last for a long, long time?

My days aren't as bright as it used to be.
My garden of roses doesn't bloom no more.
My river of purity doesn't seem to flow.
My senses have no direction.

I'm stranded.
Alone.
Cold.
I'm deprived.

dont ask me why

dont ask me why..
dont you fuckin ask me why..
coz you were never there..
you were never there..

dont ask me why..
dont you fucking ask me why..
coz you never intended to know..
you never did..

so stop asking why..
and take a few steps back..
re-evaluating the situation..
instead of asking why..

Thoughts..

until when?
why are you like this?
isn't there anything good to say?
isn't there any excitement left?
is it just plain empty?
is it because it's fated this way?

i don't mind the change of seasons,
but i don't want winter all year long,
as much as i'm longing for spring to come,
i'm left helplessly unattended.

i see the sun shining everyday,
but yet it's cold outside,
and when the moon takes over,
it seemed like it will never be day again.

with every acid rain,
it knocks me down so hard,
i'm buried to the ground,
so deep down under.

i wish to feel warmth,
i want to breathe again,
but with every step that i make,
i get more uncertain.

doing something without a clue,
a surprise in paradise,
however i feel 'm never going to get there,
without the headlights on my soul carrier.

a monster's reflection isn't what it thinks it's looking at.
or at least it denies it.

dear mum..

its been a year now. not having u around has left a big impact on me. there's no one i can to turn to anymore, no one who knows what i'm going thru at difficult times. i just wish we did something earlier to prevent the cancer from spreading, however GOD didnt want u to suffer any longer.. i hope u'r resting in peace with daddy by ur side. u can be rest assured that i will not forget you. i regretted the moment when i didnt keeep my promise to you eventho u were goin thru hell at that time. if only i cud turn back time, i wud rather endure the pain u felt. i know it wasnt easy, for u, and for the rest of us.

Dear Mum, i just want u to know that i love you from the bottom of my heart, i'm so thankful to have u as my mother, u;re the best mum anyone cud ever have, and i'm greatful enough to be brought into the world by you. i just hope that u had forgiven all my wrong doinga.

there's no way of expressing my emotions right now, only god kknows what i'm going thru. all in all, thanks for being such a wonderful parent to us all. u'll always be remembered by the people who knows u..

I LOVE U MUM.. rest in peace..
Al Fatihah..